Twelve Terms of Office (parody)

As I was reading about yet another powerful politician going down in flames (Republican Mayor West of Spokane, this time,) I was inspired to write a new parody from the P.O.V. of a fictional politician, plagued by scandal. Enjoy!


Twelve Terms of Office
(To the tune of Twelve Days of Christmas)
by Melhi


It's my first term in office, the press is dogging me
Had a fling with my secre-tar-y

It's my second term in office, they're crucifying me
Two sets of books
And a fling with my secre-tar-y

It's my third term in office, they've got the goods on me
Three spent shells
Two sets of books
And a fling with my secre-tar-y

It's my fourth term in office, they're still lambasting me
4 D.U.I.s
Three spent shells
Two sets of books
And a fling with my secre-tar-y

It's my fifth term in office, why won't they let me be?
Five bas-tard kids!
Four D.U.I.s
Three spent shells
Two sets of books
And a fling with my secre-tar-y

It's my sixth term in office, they're out to ruin me
Sex tape is streaming
Five bas-tard kids!
Four D.U.I.s
Three spent shells
Two sets of books
And a fling with my secre-tar-y

It's my seventh term in office, the press is killing me
Seven grams of "candy"
Sex tape is streaming
Five bas-tard kids!
Four D.U.I.s
Three spent shells
Two sets of books
And a fling with my secre-tar-y

It's my eighth term in office, they're out to butcher me
Ate baby seal meat
Seven grams of "candy"
Sex tape is streaming
Five bas-tard kids!
Four D.U.I.s
Three spent shells
Two sets of books
And a fling with my secre-tar-y

It's my ninth term in office and still they're plaguing me
Nine no bid contracts
Ate baby seal meat
Seven grams of "candy"
Sex tape is streaming
Five bas-tard kids!
Four D.U.I.s
Three spent shells
Two sets of books
And a fling with my secre-tar-y

It's my tenth term in office and they're destroying me,
Ten month vacation
Nine no-bid contracts
Ate baby seal meat
Seven grams of "candy"
Sex tape is streaming
Five bas-tard kids!
Four D.U.I.s
Three spent shells
Two sets of books
And a fling with my secre-tar-y

It's my eleventh term in office, they won't let up on me
Election tally rigging
Ten month vacations
Nine no-bid contracts
Ate baby seal meat
Seven grams of "candy"
Sex tape is streaming
Five bas-tard kids!
Four D.U.I.s
Three spent shells
Two sets of books
And a fling with my secre-tar-y

They're singing my praises in loving memory...
Twelve terms of office
Election tally rigging
Ten month vacations
Nine no-bid contracts
Ate baby seal meat
Seven grams of "candy"
Sex tape is streaming
Five bas-tard kids!
Four D.U.I.s
Three spent shells
Two sets of books
And a fling with my secre-tar-y